Biblically, there are five ways God expresses his love for us. And these are the five ways that we are to express love to our spouse (and others). In this post we'll unpackage God's second expression of love.
2. Quality Time
Genesis 3:8-9 reveals that God took time daily to walk and talk with Adam and Eve. God showed his love to Adam and Eve by daily spending time with them. In the same way, we can communicate love to our spouse by sharing quality time with them.
You see, the greatest gift you can give someone is your time. I John 3:18 says, "Our love should not be just words and talk; it must be true love, which shows itself in action." That is, love is not just something you feel, or just something you say, it’s something you do. In other words, you spell love T-I-M-E.
The greatest gift you can give someone is your time because time is your most precious resource. Your life is made up of seconds, minutes and hours. And when you give someone your time you are giving them a piece of your life. You can get money back, but not your time. That’s why the gift of love expressed through time is the most valuable, precious gift you could ever give.
We all have different energy levels, different amounts of wealth, different amounts of talents and different personalities, but we all have the exact same amount of time. All of us get 168 hours a week. And what we give our time to speaks volumes about what’s truly important to us. If we want to communicate to our spouse that he/she is important to us, we've got to carve out some time in our schedule for them (and not the left overs).
Giving someone your time says “You matter to me.” Giving someone your time says “You are valuable to me.” Giving someone your time says “You are worth listening to.” You’re saying all kinds of things when you give (or withhold) the gift of time.
In Luke 10:38-42 we read the story of Mary and Martha. Jesus has come for a visit. Martha is running around doing all kinds of stuff FOR Jesus, while Mary is content to just be WITH Jesus. Martha gets upset and tells Jesus to tell Mary to help her. But Jesus replies “My dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details! But there is only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her.”
From this story we learn this principle: What we do with Jesus is more important than what we do for Jesus. Well, the same is true of our spouse! What we do with them is more important than what we do for them.
The essence of loving relationships is not what we give to each other (i.e. presents/gifts/stuff). The essence of loving relationships is how much we give of ourselves to that person. Our lives. Our time! Gifts are no replacement for time.
Guys - listen up - Some of you are so busy working for your family, that you have no time to spend with your family. But this is no way to live. Your wife and kids don’t need more stuff. They need you! They need you to express your love to them through quality (and quantity) of time. Pastor and author Chuck Swindoll once wrote “Busyness fills the calendar but frustrates the family”, so don’t get caught up in the busyness trap. Take the time to show your love by giving your spouse (and family) quality time.
Be deliberate this week to think about ways to spend some time with your spouse. Remember the things that you used to do while you were dating, the things that brought you together in the first place. Whether it’s taking a walk, going for a hike, going skiing, playing a game or going out to dinner. And be sure to put down your phones and give each other your undivided attention. That just may be the thing your marriage needs to get some of its spark back.
2. Quality Time
Genesis 3:8-9 reveals that God took time daily to walk and talk with Adam and Eve. God showed his love to Adam and Eve by daily spending time with them. In the same way, we can communicate love to our spouse by sharing quality time with them.
You see, the greatest gift you can give someone is your time. I John 3:18 says, "Our love should not be just words and talk; it must be true love, which shows itself in action." That is, love is not just something you feel, or just something you say, it’s something you do. In other words, you spell love T-I-M-E.
The greatest gift you can give someone is your time because time is your most precious resource. Your life is made up of seconds, minutes and hours. And when you give someone your time you are giving them a piece of your life. You can get money back, but not your time. That’s why the gift of love expressed through time is the most valuable, precious gift you could ever give.
We all have different energy levels, different amounts of wealth, different amounts of talents and different personalities, but we all have the exact same amount of time. All of us get 168 hours a week. And what we give our time to speaks volumes about what’s truly important to us. If we want to communicate to our spouse that he/she is important to us, we've got to carve out some time in our schedule for them (and not the left overs).
Giving someone your time says “You matter to me.” Giving someone your time says “You are valuable to me.” Giving someone your time says “You are worth listening to.” You’re saying all kinds of things when you give (or withhold) the gift of time.
In Luke 10:38-42 we read the story of Mary and Martha. Jesus has come for a visit. Martha is running around doing all kinds of stuff FOR Jesus, while Mary is content to just be WITH Jesus. Martha gets upset and tells Jesus to tell Mary to help her. But Jesus replies “My dear Martha, you are worried and upset over all these details! But there is only one thing worth being concerned about. Mary has discovered it, and it will not be taken away from her.”
From this story we learn this principle: What we do with Jesus is more important than what we do for Jesus. Well, the same is true of our spouse! What we do with them is more important than what we do for them.
The essence of loving relationships is not what we give to each other (i.e. presents/gifts/stuff). The essence of loving relationships is how much we give of ourselves to that person. Our lives. Our time! Gifts are no replacement for time.
Guys - listen up - Some of you are so busy working for your family, that you have no time to spend with your family. But this is no way to live. Your wife and kids don’t need more stuff. They need you! They need you to express your love to them through quality (and quantity) of time. Pastor and author Chuck Swindoll once wrote “Busyness fills the calendar but frustrates the family”, so don’t get caught up in the busyness trap. Take the time to show your love by giving your spouse (and family) quality time.
Be deliberate this week to think about ways to spend some time with your spouse. Remember the things that you used to do while you were dating, the things that brought you together in the first place. Whether it’s taking a walk, going for a hike, going skiing, playing a game or going out to dinner. And be sure to put down your phones and give each other your undivided attention. That just may be the thing your marriage needs to get some of its spark back.
No comments:
Post a Comment