The Bible is clear. If someone refuses to repent of sin, even though Matthew 18:15-17 has been followed, we are to remove them from our fellowship (click here to learn more). But it's important to understand that the nature of church discipline is redemptive. That is, we’re not to kick people out of church just to kick them out and have nothing to do with them anymore. Paul says the person is kicked out “...so that his sinful nature will be destroyed and he himself will be saved...” That is, the person is kicked out in hopes that he will repent - in hopes that he will turn from sin and be saved.
At one church I served at there was a girl in the youth ministry who claimed to be a Christian yet was living in unrepentant sexual sin. She denied it but I knew otherwise and sadly, eventually, had to ask her to leave the student ministry at our church. Within a month it became known that she was pregnant out of wedlock. This girl probably hated me for a while (as did some in the church who didn’t have all the details and thought I was being too harsh, even though I was only doing exactly what the Bible said I should do). But long story short, things in the relationship with her and her boyfriend went south quick and this girl was devastated by the hurt and pain that sin always inevitably brings into our lives. She came to her senses, repented of her sin and wrote me an apology letter telling me she wished she had listened to me. At this point she was welcome back in our fellowship. That was some 7 or 8 years ago now, but last I heard, she was actively involved in ministry. In other words - it all worked out for good. Having missed the loving fellowship of other believers and having experienced first hand the destructive power of sin - she repented and came back to the Lord and to our church.
At one church I served at there was a girl in the youth ministry who claimed to be a Christian yet was living in unrepentant sexual sin. She denied it but I knew otherwise and sadly, eventually, had to ask her to leave the student ministry at our church. Within a month it became known that she was pregnant out of wedlock. This girl probably hated me for a while (as did some in the church who didn’t have all the details and thought I was being too harsh, even though I was only doing exactly what the Bible said I should do). But long story short, things in the relationship with her and her boyfriend went south quick and this girl was devastated by the hurt and pain that sin always inevitably brings into our lives. She came to her senses, repented of her sin and wrote me an apology letter telling me she wished she had listened to me. At this point she was welcome back in our fellowship. That was some 7 or 8 years ago now, but last I heard, she was actively involved in ministry. In other words - it all worked out for good. Having missed the loving fellowship of other believers and having experienced first hand the destructive power of sin - she repented and came back to the Lord and to our church.
You see - when someone is kicked out of the church, they are removed from the love of the church and subjected to the destruction and death brought about by sin. This gives the person strong motivation to repent and turn back to God and to church fellowship. Any church discipline that isn't redemptive in nature isn't biblical church discipline.
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